From: Maung Yit
EMail: mgyit@yahoo.com
The art of cooking dangerously….. Mg yit
I wont condemn ppl who could cook and also for ppl who could not make it. To b a cook or not 2 b…it is not a question to me in either way….and for me… I chose myself not to b…a cook.
I still can remember my cooking days with all the good memory. I happen to b a cook but not a good cook but an accidental cook.
The first time I cooked was… well… don tell anybodies… I cooked for my dogs. Yes…that's it. I really became a dog cook. Last time, I used to hav an army of dogs at my home. Then, the human family's leftover were not enough for my army of dogs…(actually not an army but a size of a football team like MU or National team..). I had to cook for my dog with all my best of my imagination. And luckily, they (my army..oops my football team… oops… my doggies) never made a single complaint in their whole life.
Then life went on…I happened to become a RITian and then I became a dog & met with the dog cooks at the hostel in my school days. Actually I was not a hostel student but a day student. However, as usual, in life, ppl lov to switch identity, u no…rich ppl wanna b poor and poor wanna b other way round…so I tried to look like a hostel student and end up with the dog cook.
It was poetically speaking… the hostel's dishes were not that bad like I cooked for my doggies.. it was to b blamed on me coz I was alittle bit choosy. The chicken happened to b older than us and thinner than me..the veggies happened to b an export products from Sahara and the duck had never got a chance to born free but end up in the dish as an egg. But we all loved hostel's dishes…cross my heart n hope to die n strike a big lotto…Coz in the school days…we were not really having a meal there…. We were having a very good & innocent friendship between our fellow students. (Sob..) I missed the good old school dishes oops days..(Sob..)
If anybodies were offended with my poetic wording of comparing the students with dogs on the hostels' dishes issue… Sorry byar….In our Burmese history ( excuse me for my big mouth again) our Burmese students were never never and never been treated like dogs by any bodies. We were never been kicked… never been beaten… never been driven out of place…never been poisoned with Municipals like dog in our Burmese history…is it? Is it? Is….it…..?
Ok..enough…next paragraph. After that… once in a life time, I cooked a special dish for my other half in my teens's day. Not a dog food, u no…it is a love food… (laugh) a fried egg. I had never done any decent deeds in life. I never did a national service…never donate blood…never did any volunteer service for the family…for my school and for my country…yes I meant it. I jus did wat I jus want to do and I never did it for others jus for my self. But once in a life time, (not every time u met an opposite sex any time in life naw!!!) u fell in love. Then u did a crazy thing that others dared not such as plucking the DUWON Star from the sky…sang a song….wrote a poem…wait at the lecture hall entrance…or bus stop…and so on. So I also like a human being…did one crazy thing in life…to fried an egg and treat her at the lunch. Hey man… she loved my cooking… then she chose to b with me 4ever to eat my special dish for her whole life!!!! Well now may b she might regret it coz the rainy days never stop and we end up eating fried egg every day… (laugh) (joking par byar… we also can eat instant noodles also…oops)
Then one day, I came to foreign land to look for a job…Oh oh…not to work as a cook…to work as a proud engineer graduated from our big old RIT. Then me, under the pitiful eyes of my friends…became a useless guy (109/110) struck at their flat alone while they were going work in the day time. So I tried to learn new things to kill the time while waiting for the interview call…cleaning the flat…washing dishes…tidying the room….killing the blood sucking bugs (Gya Boe) from their beds…
And one day..one of my friend gav me call to ask me to cook a rice in their rice cooker coz he would b late from work…. I suddenly became a very proud gentleman, as I was trust with a big task to accomplish for the sake of their future of their dinner. According to my CV or Resume..I was once upon a time a dog cook & also a love cook without any recommendation from any past employers and my school professors… then came a great & rare opportunity to prove that I could still b a useful human in the society by cooking a rice in a rice cooker!!!
So with all my engineering maths taught from school… I did a lot of calculations…to convert the 5 cups of rice in the cooker to become an eatable. As I could recalled my past memory…I used a cup of water or two to cook a cup of rice or two. So if I were to cook 5 cups of rice… I would rather use 5 cups of water!!!! Voila!!!! It was that simple… And then I acted swiftly….and waited the output from the cooker very proudly for the cheers & applauses from my home coming tired looking friends…
Well..to make it short…it was alittle bit overcooked u no… according to my friends' interpretation, my rice was too good to eat at the dinner table so be`. As they put the words very nicely as the rice was designed for over-aged ppl with no teeth… (no gum..also can..), it was too sacred to eat with the mouth of the young generation like them. So they opend the door of the garbage chute in the kitchen…instead of throwing me into that tunnel, they chose my rice eatable to rest in peace.
Well, until now I m still alive to relate my stories of my cooking days…luckily like my army of dogs in the past, they never complained…but they never jump their conclusion to marry me like my other half, luckily… (shhh!!!)
My msg to Gyit Tu who wrote "The Cooking & I" got a taste of a well prepared dish and in return, with my poor English & my poor cooking skill, I also present you with my cooking story. Pls hav a good digestion for it and wish u all not to hav an upset stomach.
Mg yit